Female Ejaculation: Yes, It’s Real (and Amazing)
Sex Advice on Anatomy, Technique, and the Liberation of Letting Go
What Is Female Ejaculation
Female ejaculation has been denied, misunderstood, and fetishized for generations. It is often left out of sexual education entirely or misrepresented in porn without proper context. The truth is that female ejaculation is a real and natural function of the body. It does not happen for everyone, and it is not required for great sex, but for many people it can be a deeply pleasurable and emotionally powerful experience. It is also a valid part of sexual wellness that deserves to be acknowledged with clarity and respect.
The fluid released during female ejaculation comes from the Skene’s glands, also known as the female prostate. These glands sit close to the urethra and can release fluid during arousal, especially when stimulated through the G-spot. While the fluid passes through the urethra, it is not urine. Studies have found that it contains components similar to seminal fluid, though it contains no sperm. Some people experience a slow release, while others may gush. Both responses are normal and beautiful.
Understanding the Anatomy of the G-Spot
What is commonly referred to as the G-spot is actually part of the urethral sponge. This is a spongy area located about one to three inches inside the front wall of the vagina, toward the belly. During arousal, the urethral sponge becomes engorged and more sensitive. Inside that tissue are the Skene’s glands, which can be activated with pressure or massage.
To find it, insert a lubricated finger or toy into the vagina and gently press upward toward the belly button. Use a steady rhythm and moderate pressure rather than speed or light strokes. When the urethral sponge is stimulated, it can trigger sensations of fullness or even the urge to urinate. That feeling often means you are close to releasing. With breath, focus, and comfort, that urge can give way to pleasure and flow.
Why It Feels Emotional
Ejaculation is not only physical. For many people, it also involves emotional release. It is not uncommon to cry, tremble, laugh, or even feel vulnerable during or after ejaculation. This is not a malfunction or a problem. It is a somatic response. Your nervous system is processing energy. For people who have experienced trauma or shame around their bodies, ejaculation can also bring up feelings that have been buried or ignored. This is part of the healing process.
We live in a culture that often encourages vulva-owners to be small, discreet, and contained. But ejaculation asks us to let go. It is wet, wild, messy, and often unpredictable. That can be scary at first, but it can also be incredibly liberating. The act of releasing control and allowing the body to speak for itself is deeply powerful.
Exploring Female Ejaculation: A Step-by-Step Guide
If you are interested in exploring female ejaculation on your own or with a partner, here are a few steps that can help make the experience more comfortable and enjoyable.
Start by preparing your space. It helps to empty your bladder before you begin. Lay down a towel to protect your bedding or use a waterproof blanket. Keep water and a thick water-based or hybrid lubricant nearby. If you are using fingers, trim your nails and wash your hands. If you are using a toy, make sure it is clean and ideally curved for internal stimulation.
When you are ready, insert your finger or toy into the vagina and press gently toward the front wall. Use a steady, rhythmic motion that feels good and grounding. Think of this like deep massage rather than fast stimulation. When the urge to urinate comes up, breathe deeply and relax instead of pulling back. Clenching will block the flow. Releasing will help it move.
Let the process unfold without judgment. Some people experience ejaculation during solo play because they feel safe and uninhibited. Others may need the emotional support and erotic surrender that comes from a trusted partner. There is no correct method. The key is to be present with your body and to give it full permission to respond.
Clearing Up the Myths
One of the most common myths is that female ejaculation is just urine. This is not true. Research shows that while trace amounts of urea can sometimes be present, the majority of the fluid contains prostatic proteins that are chemically distinct from urine.
Another myth is that only some people can squirt. While anatomy does vary, most vulva-owners have the structures needed to experience ejaculation. Whether or not it happens depends on arousal, comfort, hydration, technique, and the ability to let go of performance pressure.
Lastly, ejaculation is not a badge of sexual achievement. It is not a better orgasm. It is simply one of many types of pleasure the body can offer. You do not need to squirt to have a full and satisfying sex life.
Why This Matters
Talking openly about female ejaculation matters because education is power. When we learn about our anatomy and what is possible within our bodies, we gain access to deeper levels of self-trust and connection. Whether or not you ever experience ejaculation, simply knowing how it works and how to approach it with care is part of building a healthy relationship to your sexuality.
Exploring this part of yourself can be fun, vulnerable, powerful, and even spiritual. It is not about performance or pressure. It is about curiosity and permission. Your body is allowed to take up space. Your pleasure is valid in whatever form it shows up.
Nina's Sex Advice
Most people do not squirt when they are trying too hard. Relaxation, breath, and deep pelvic stimulation are essential. Use lube. Take your time. Trust your body. If you are curious and it has not happened yet, that is okay. You are not doing it wrong. You are simply learning what your erotic rhythm looks like. There is no finish line. There is only exploration.
Final Thoughts
Female ejaculation is not a trick or a spectacle. It is a natural and powerful response that some people experience when they feel safe, aroused, and free. If you are interested in exploring it, do it for yourself, not for someone else. And remember that whether it happens or not, you are not broken or behind. You are learning. You are connecting. And you are absolutely allowed to enjoy every step of that journey.