Hi. If you’ve found your way to this page you and I already have something important in common, that being a shared interest in sex, sexuality and sexual expression. You may be novice to this kind of exploration or a seasoned player, but we’re all here because we love sex (or want to) and to discover more about it.

I’ve been thinking about sex, sexuality and sexual expression pretty much full time since I was in grade school, so much so I’ve made a career of it since 1984. My job is as exciting to me today as it was when I first stepped foot on a stage when I was in nursing school preparing to be a nurse-midwife. I’m so happy to be able to share what I know with those who want to have the conversation.

I believe that in our culture sexuality is sick, and sick people need a nurse’s care. What do  I mean? Simply this: instead of our innate sexuality being a reliable source of pleasure, love, compassion, bonding and mental and emotional health and comfort, for many people it’s a reliable source of  pain, isolation, anger, alienation and very real mental and emotional anguish.

What do I mean by “a nurse’s care?” In a word, TLC. At the very least a nurse creates a safe place to experience, and express, pain. A nurse does everything possible to ease suffering without themselves being adversely affected by it, including providing compassion and simple human connection and recognition, to go along with any physical care needed. 

Until we can do this for ourselves we sometimes need assistance to learn this skill. So, thank you for being here willing to take a deeper look. 

My intention throughout my career has been to be, as they say, “the change I want to see in the world.” Toward that end I practice what I preach and have learned that any motivated person can succeed at this work because learning to experience, share and accept pleasure is personally revolutionary. It doesn’t matter who we are or what our history may be. When we turn our attention toward it, the power of consensual pleasure to transform our lives in lasting, positive ways is astounding. 

I envision a world with more peace, love and active compassion. I envision a world where each person can feel at home in, and one with, their body, free of shame or guilt over having, or wanting to have, simple, safe, pleasure in whatever form. 

I believe truly that consenting adults can do whatever they please. I don’t have to like it and have the right to an opinion, but if it’s not harming self or others I support their right to do it. 

I’ve had enough sex to lose my fear of it but never my respect for it. I want everyone to have, in the words of a friend, “Only the sex you want with only the people you want, in the way(s) that you want, for as long as you want, and no other kind.”