Ask Nina: I’ve Never Squirted — Is Something Wrong With Me

A Gentle Q&A About Female Ejaculation, Pressure, and Permission

Dear Nina,
I keep hearing about squirting. I have seen it in videos, heard my friends talk about it, and read articles that say every woman can do it. I have tried, but it has never happened for me. Am I doing something wrong? Is something wrong with me

— Curious but Concerned

Dear Curious One,

Thank you for your honesty and your trust. First, let me say this as clearly as possible.

No. There is nothing wrong with you.

Not squirting does not mean you are broken, behind, or missing out. It means your body is giving you the information it has right now. That is always valid. That is always enough.

Female ejaculation is real. Some people experience it. Some do not. Some squirt once and never again. Others find it happens more easily under certain conditions, with certain kinds of touch, or when they feel deeply relaxed and emotionally safe. But it is not a requirement for pleasure. It is not a goal you need to reach. It is simply one of many ways the body can respond to arousal and internal stimulation.

Why It Might Not Happen Yet

There are several reasons why someone might not squirt, and none of them are signs of failure. You may not have found the technique that works for your unique body. You may feel subconscious about mess, control, or performance. You may be tightening your pelvic floor when you get close to the edge. You may simply not respond strongly to stimulation of the urethral sponge, and that is perfectly okay.

Also, emotional readiness plays a role. Squirting requires letting go, not just physically but emotionally. It asks your body to release, to flood, to expand. For many people, that level of openness takes time. It may never be your body’s preferred way of expressing pleasure, and that is still a beautiful truth.

Let’s Talk About Pressure

Cultural pressure around squirting has grown, especially with the rise of adult content that frames it as a visual achievement or something to perform. That can create shame or anxiety in people who do not experience it.

You do not owe anyone a squirt. Not your partner. Not your fantasy. Not yourself. If it happens, let it happen. If it does not, your orgasm, your pleasure, and your sexual experience are still whole and meaningful.

If You Want to Explore It Gently

If you are curious about awakening this part of your body, you can absolutely explore that with care. Start with a well-lubricated finger or toy and stimulate the front wall of the vagina, toward the belly. Focus on pressure rather than speed. When you feel the urge to urinate, breathe and soften. That is often the signal that you are close.

But please do not force it. And do not measure your success by whether or not fluid comes out. Let the journey be about curiosity, not expectation.

Nina Says

In my own body, squirting did not happen often. Sometimes it came unexpectedly. Sometimes not at all. And never once did I believe that my orgasms were worth less because they did not include ejaculation.

I have had small orgasms and big ones. Loud ones and quiet ones. Orgasms that came in thirty seconds and orgasms that came after an hour. Each one had its own truth. That is how bodies work. They are not machines. They are stories. They are moods. They are alive.

Final Thought

You are not missing anything. You are learning what your body loves. That is the most sacred work of all. You do not need to squirt to be sensual. You do not need to squirt to be sexually fulfilled. And you definitely do not need to squirt to be enough.

You are already enough. You are already whole.

Keep exploring if it excites you. Let go of it if it does not. Pleasure is not a performance. It is a relationship. And your body knows how to guide you if you listen gently and with love.